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One Sentence Meme (Press Gang edition)

pg - lynda
I just found this on my hard-drive - I did it a few weeks ago as a writing exercise and forgot about it. (And I'm definitely stretching the definition of a sentence to breaking point in some cases. Heh.) I can't remember where I found the meme - somewhere about.


Angst

Lynda says she cares, she just doesn’t care very much, but the truth is she can’t afford to: there are echoes of gunshots in her head.


AU

“Colin, I want the books now; Julie, I want at least half of the waitressing staff fired; I want that cappuccino machine fixed yesterday; those pigeons were supposed to be dealt with last week, and Spike – get back in the kitchen!”


Crack

“Just a wild guess,” said Lynda, watching the stream of giant rabbits walk through the newsroom, “but has Colin got a fan club?”


Crossover (Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy)

“Are you trying to tell me that the world is going to end because Colin’s gone and sold the planet to aliens who want to knock it down and build a hyperspace by-pass?”


Death

After the first death there is no other, that’s what they say, but Lynda finds they only keep on coming.


Episode-Related (Both Sides of the Paper, S1)

“It wasn’t till they found the third teacher dead of shock this morning that I realised what had happened – and, wait, you might wanna hold the front page for this – I actually passed three and a half exams!”


First Time

Even what rapidly comes after can’t take away the heady thrill of holding the newly printed Junior Gazette in her hands - Lynda’s very own first edition.


Fluff

“You’ve got ice-cream on your nose,” says Kenny, passing Sam a tissue, and then wonders why she looks at him as if he’s missed an important point somewhere – but then he’s never been much good at this dating business.


Humour

“You know,” said Spike, “I think I’ve figured out one of life’s great mysteries – why all those chickens keep crossing roads: I bet Lynda told them to do it!”


Hurt/Comfort

Lynda and Spike hold on in unwise ways sometimes, they hold on till it hurts, but it’s also true that at the worst points in their lives, they hold to each other as tightly as they can, when nobody else can reach them.


Smut

Lynda says sorry about what happened with the pencil, but mainly she looks smug, puts her arms around Spike and whispers in his ear: “Want to know what else I can do with a pencil?”


UST

“For the last time, Spike, I do not fancy you, I do not want to go out with you, I don’t even like you, and you – damn!” Lynda said as she woke up – again.



(It's hard. I think I prefer word limits!)

Crossposted from Dreamwidth -- Comments there: comment count unavailable

Comments

( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
swordznsorcery
Jul. 6th, 2014 09:04 pm (UTC)
Those are great! My favourites are "Crack", "Crossover" and "UST". The latter especially made me laugh out loud, and is definitely, definitely canon. I'm sorry, Lynda, but it is. "Crack" is probably also canon. For some reason I just see that one happening, in one of those nice, random little moments they used to throw in. Great stuff! And I don't think you've stretched the definition of sentence at all. Your semi-colons are perfectly placed.
lost_spook
Jul. 7th, 2014 07:26 pm (UTC)
Thank you! And UST is canon, so much so I only hope I haven't nicked it word for word from one of the episodes.

Your semi-colons are perfectly placed.

*blushes* No one's ever said that to me before! :lol:
dimity_blue
Jul. 6th, 2014 10:29 pm (UTC)
I love 'Crack'. The image is just beautiful...and hilarious.

Thanks for sharing these. I think word limits would be far easier to deal with.
lost_spook
Jul. 7th, 2014 07:27 pm (UTC)
:-) Crack is kind of inevitable really.

I decided by the end that a three sentence fic meme would have been easier, and I don't mind 50 words, or drabbles, but a sentence...! It is a fun exercise, though, to see what you can manage within the limit, and that's the only point really.
persiflage_1
Jul. 7th, 2014 09:28 am (UTC)
I am much amused. Well done!

You may have stretched the definition - but you didn't break it!
lost_spook
Jul. 7th, 2014 07:28 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I think I nearly broke some of the sentences, but I managed to hold on with some sticky tape and elastic. :lol:
persiflage_1
Jul. 7th, 2014 07:37 pm (UTC)
*giggles*
paranoidangel42
Jul. 7th, 2014 11:58 am (UTC)
I love these, especially as I've just been re-watching some Press Gang. I really like Colin selling the planet to aliens (he would), Spike passing three and a half exams (only he could pass half an exam) and Kenny being oblivious about the ice cream on Sam's nose.
lost_spook
Jul. 7th, 2014 07:28 pm (UTC)
Ha, I'd just been watching some of S2 yesterday - it was what reminded me I'd done this last time I'd watched a bit. :-)

And thank you! ♥
jekesta
Jul. 9th, 2014 08:06 pm (UTC)
Oh I love one sentence fics and these are beautiful and press gang! Oh, so cheering, thank you. Especially the hitchhikers cross over one, and the cafe au would be just as brilliant as the original I think. Anything would so long as Lynda was in it.
lost_spook
Jul. 9th, 2014 08:37 pm (UTC)
Aw, thank you! :-)

I don't know why it was a coffee shop AU. I think people keep talking about them. It probably should have been a space ship or something. Mind, it's hard to imagine Lynda not being obsessed with running a newspaper.
susanmarier
Sep. 6th, 2014 10:51 pm (UTC)
Lol super humor. Great job.
My favorite is the crossover!
lost_spook
Sep. 7th, 2014 06:22 am (UTC)
Thank you! :-)
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )

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